Before and After You
by LovelessLawless-X
Summary: It's been almost 2 months since Gary Smith was taken away to the asylum.Pete POV only. for now This is a a fanfic with different pairings like PeteXGary PeteXJimmy hints of GaryXJimmy. Yaoi Warning. Rated M for later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**If your reading this then this is the edited version! Yes, it is still the same story however some slight lines and parts have been changed, so feel free to read it again. I fixed it, so it is 100% Pete's P.O.V Thank you so much for all the favorites,advice and support and enjoy the story so far! - Loveless **  
**_**

I woke up with a jolt, sitting upward in my bed. My breathing was ragged and shallow.  
I quickly looked over to check if Jimmy had been woken up..

He moved a bit and mumbled something. But he seemed to stay asleep.

I let out a sigh of relief , my face felt sweaty and my head was pounding. I had kept having that dream… no, not a dream… a memory. Of Gary's distant eyes and angry face being taken away in a police car. That was the last time I saw and even made eye contact with Gary. It's almost been two months though.

Since Gary was taken away to the asylum.

In the morning I got up early.  
I went into the bathroom and closed the door quietly.

I turned on the shower, undressed myself and slipped in. I let the hot water hit my face.

I sighed and began washing myself. Since Gary had been gone it's just been… more lonely. At least Gary would take me places like the store or off to egg a building.

Not that I approved of Gary's actions… but at least he would say more then a few words to me each day.

Jimmy just says good morning and good night. Unless he needs me to give him money or help him with his school work.

Whenever I try to talk to him about it…Jimmy calls me his "friend" and pats me on the back. Then off he goes being the "King" of the school. I bit my cheek.

A part of me.. Did miss Gary's teasing, I miss Gary in general...I don't remember surviving without him at this school, I.. need h-

Suddenly interrupting my thoughts. Jimmy knocked rather loudly on the door.

"Pete, I need to use the shower!" I realized I had been in here for a while.

"o-oh right! Sorry Jimmy, I'll be right out.." I quickly turned off the shower grabbed a towel and wrapped it around myself. Picking up my clothes I opened the door and letting Jimmy pass me.

I winced as the door shut loudly behind me and locked.

Well… Jimmy had be nice to me. When Gary was first taken away. Jimmy had told me that he would room with me. To make sure I was alright after what had happened.

I smiled at the memory.

I opened the dresser and got changed in a white shirt and vest. I stared at the white shirt for a moment remembering my pink one that was in the back of the dresser now.

Pulled the Bullworth Sweater Vest over my head, put on some pants and socks.

I dried and brushed my hair out. I put the brush down just as I heard the shower stop.  
I moved away from the dresser and picked up a study book I had left on the desk last night, trying to stay out of Jimmy's way.

Jimmy walked over to the dresser and started getting changed.

I turned my attention back to the desk. Gary used to sit here often and plot. I let out a silent shaky laugh. He would sit here when he wanted to talk to me but would never admit that to himself. Memories flowed back. Femme-boy. A pet name, I normally would get angry but.. I dunno. I stopped myself, pausing for a moment.

Damn it.  
Everything I do reminds me of him. I thought closing my eyes and furrowing my eye brows.

" I'm pathetic." I said quietly letting out a deep sigh.

"I knew that much." Jimmy said laughing.

"Real funny Jimmy." I said sharply, shooting a glare in his direction. Jimmy was still changing and didn't seem to notice it.

Jimmy turned around meeting my glare with a smirk.

" I'm kidding! Take a joke Pete." He said, then walking over to me and giving me a rough pat on the back.

"Ow…" I mumbled.

"Weak and dorky as usual." Jimmy saying with a short laugh.

Before I could disagree. Jimmy waved and said goodbye, leaving me alone.

I stared at the door that had just been closed for a minute or two.

Off the class then. I sighed… I seem to be doing that a lot lately.

I had just finished English.

I'll just… Skip lunch again. I'm just not hungry anymore..

Instead I've started writing songs. I didn't know if they were any good but they made me feel better.

I started walking down the hall to my locker to get my music I had already started working on when I saw Trent and Wade were in my way. I cursed lightly under my breath.

I'll just start a new song.

Better then trying to get them to move. I turned around and started walking praying that I hadn't been noticed.

"Hey! Girly boy!" I heard Wade shout.

I sighed and kept walking, ignoring Wade.

I heard a pairs of loud stomps running behind me.  
I glanced back seeing Trent and Wade running up behind him.

Before I could start running Trent tackled me to the ground from behind.

"Ach!" my face hit the tiled hallway floor. I felt my jaw being bruised."Hah!" Wade said laughing with a crooked smile.

" Didn't you mom ever teach you that it's rude to ignore people." Trent said  
as he got off of me.

I pulled him self off the floor.

I should tell them off… but.. I can't. I backed away a little. Maybe I can make a run for it.

I shifted my eyes looking for possible exits.

"Aw where you planning to run to?" Wade said smirking. My attention back to them now.

" Oh? To _Gary_? _Oh yeah_ that's right!" Trent started. Seeing how I was getting angry.

Don't you dare say it. I shut my eyes and kept my head down.

"They've got him all _locked up_? Where's your body guard now, Girly Boy" Trent said, his words oozing out of his mouth, just waiting to see my reaction.

I felt tears coming to the corners of my eyes. Crap. Crap. Crap. I can't start crying now! I felt my face getting hot.

Wade shoved me again, this time I got hit against a locker.

"Hey!" A louder voice called. With the sound of stomping. Next thing I knew Wade was on the ground curled up, holding his stomach and Trent was getting his ass handed to him by the stairs. My vision was blurred with tears. I couldn't quite see who it was.

"Pete! Pete!" The voice yelled shaking my shoulders. " G-gary?" I said letting the tears fall down my face.

The person stopped shaking me and paused for a moment. "Not quite."

I blinked a few times.

It was Jimmy. His face looked hurt from what I had just said. I opened my mouth to say something but nothing came out.

Jimmy let go of my shoulders, grabbed my wrist and dragged me to the boys washroom.

"Get cleaned up." Jimmy said looking down frustrated.

I looked down at the sink and turned on the tap. Letting the water rush over my hands.  
I looked up into the mirror's refection and saw Jimmy slouching against the wall frame of the washroom.

I splashed away the tears on my face and rubbed my eyes.

"Pete…" Jimmy said his voice was low..

"um..y-yeah Jimmy?" I said looking up from the paper towel I was drying my face with.

"You really miss Gary that much, huh?" Jimmy said, his eyes seemed to be directed on a certain spot on the floor.

I held my breath.

"J-Jimmy if this is about how I called you Gary-"

"Answer the question Pete."

"…Ok…yes. I do... Happy?" I said as I clenched the paper towel in my hands.

It was silent for a moment then suddenly Jimmy laughed a little.

"What?" I said confused with the change of his mood.

" Nothing! Haha.. The way you said it, I guess." he said with an amused tone.

Jimmy looked up and made direct eye contact with me.

Jimmy's eyes weren't as… angry as usual? Something was different, his face was…softer.

" I better head out. The Greasers said they need something…Hey and Pete…"

I threw out my paper towel and turned back to Jimmy. "Y-yeah Jimmy?"

"I'm not angry that you called out Gary's name instead. He's usually the one saving you."

"oh…" I said looking down feeling guilty and a bit embarrassed. "r-right.. Thanks.."

I stood there listening to the steps of Jimmy walk away..

I smiled to myself.

"I just thought of a new song" I said quietly.


	2. Chapter 2

I got up from the bench I was sitting on and sighed lightly.

I felt cold. Even though the air was warm. I picked up the music papers off the bench that I had been working on and started walking back to the school.

Almost fall.. already? Halloween seems soon too. I tried to make an angry face but a smile burst through as I remembered my pink bunny costume. Gary insisted I should wear it.. for what reason? I really didn't want to know.

Not like I'm going out this Halloween anyways though. I mean the only reason that I went out before was because Gary and all his "plans". Was he really my only friend? That's…. really sad.

I slouched slightly. Making my way across the bridge up to the school.

"Move it, Loser!" Some bullies pushed past me as they chased some kid up the hill.

I winced as they hit my shoulder were I had gotten a bruise from Wade earlier today.

I would have shouted 'Hey! Watch where your going!' but.. I can't fight and I can't bring my self to yell at them, I let out a deep breath.

When I got to his room, I looked over at Jimmy's bed.

It was terribly messy.

I mean I'm not a neat freak or anything but I have to draw the line somewhere.  
There were stains of different colors and it smells of something curled up and died somewhere in the mess of sheets, I wrinkled my nose.

I walked over to to my own bed and crouched down.

I pulled a box out from under it and put the music sheets in it, then slid it back under the bed.

I looked back at my own bed, then back at Jimmy's doing a comparison.

Mine on the other hand smelt lovely and was folded nicely.

I resisted the urge to clean and disinfect Jimmy's bed and made my way to the bathroom to have a warm shower.

-  
As I left the bathroom I saw Jimmy going through the dresser.

" What are you looking for?"I said tilting my head slightly.

" Oh, um…" he shuffled around a bit more. " Something of Zoe's she left here earlier today I think I threw it in here….."

"Ah.." I trailed off as I walked over to my bed where I left a pair of gray pajama bottoms, boxers and a white T-shirt.

"Have you seen a-…" Jimmy started and ended his sentence staring at me.

"W-what?" I glared and backed up a bit.

Jimmy laughed a little, a smug look appearing on his face. "You hold your towel like a girl Pete."

"What?" I frowned.

"Nothing, nothing, don't worry about it." Jimmy said turning back around going threw the dresser again.

I looked at myself and grumbled.

I put on my boxers and bottoms. Just as I was pulling the shirt over my head…

"Have you stopped eating of something?" Jimmy said in a questioning tone.

I froze. " Um…"

"Whatever, It's just that.. Your looking skinner then Mandy…" Jimmy shrugged flopping over on his bed.

I lifted up my shirt, and looked at my ribs. "Ah… I have lost some weight I guess.."

I sat on my bed holding my arms slightly in the silence.

Hmm. Zoe, right!… well Zoe and Jimmy had been going out the whole time since the Gary…um…"situation" . They are in a steady relationship, but I never could get used to Zoe it's not like I don't like her but… there's almost like a tension between us. I closed my eyes in thought.

Suddenly something solid hit my head and I opened my eyes abruptly. "ow, What the hell!" I said while I clutched my head.

"Eat it." Jimmy said sitting up in his bed now.

I looked down at the object that had been tossed at my head.

"A.. granola bar?" I exclaimed looking at Jimmy.

"Yeah, Well…." Jimmy shrugged looking down. "I also didn't see you eat dinner."

I just started at the bent bar. "T-That's kind of you Jimmy but.. really I'm not hungry."

I put on a fake smile looking up to meet Jimmy's glare. Ah his temper. I looked away quickly biting my lip. Crap I hope I didn't make him angry… Maybe I should just eat it.

I glanced back up quickly, just to meet eyes again with an angry stare.

I quickly unwrapped the bar and took a small bite out of the corner of it.

Mm, it didn't taste that bad. It had chocolate chips in it. Next thing I knew the granola bar was gone.

I clutched the wrapper in his hand and looked up at Jimmy who was still staring at me.

"What now?" I said. A frown forming on my face.

Jimmy looked bemused.

"You hum when you eat." Jimmy pointed out.

"W-What?" I hadn't noticed.

Jimmy let out a laugh. "What you didn't realize you were?"

"Not…really." I mumbled looking down embarrassed, waiting for Jimmy to say something else but… it went silent again.

I looked up to see Jimmy lying down on his side with his eyes closed.

He didn't make fun of me? I was confused. Maybe it's because I did what he wanted or maybe because Jimmy's not Gary...

I pulled my legs up onto my bed and lied down.

I listened to Jimmy's snores as I fell asleep.

-  
I woke up later the usual.

I sat up and rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and looked around.  
A bright light was shining though the curtains. "Tch…what time is it?" I mumbled to himself, reaching over to the clock.

To my surprise I had slept till lunch time. Still not awake I got up out of bed and tripped over blankets that had fallen off of me in the night and landed face first on the wood floor.

"aaaaowwww…" I said trying to pick myself off the floor.

I sat up rubbing my forehead. I glanced around the room.

Jimmy must have already left. He didn't even wake me up! I grumbled. Then again…. I wouldn't dare wake Jimmy up.

I got up off the floor and felt dizzy "ugh.." I shut my eyes and held my head. "I'll just… sleep…a bit longer…." I said falling over on my bed again.

"Pete….Pete! Wake up man… Pete!" I felt someone abruptly shaking my shoulders and yelling at me.

"m…mmurm…" I mumbled as I opened my eyes a little focusing on the person over me.

"J-Jimmy?" I said looking through the bright blur.

"About time you woke up, It's almost 7pm man." Jimmy said letting go of me.

"Ah, really?" I said sitting up slowly. Looking over to see Jimmy in a dress shirt and decent pants.

"Yeah, I can't believe you slept that long. That can't be good for you." Jimmy said while putting on a loose tie.  
" No I woke up around lunch…. I guess I fell back to sleep…" I trailed off.. "Going somewhere?" I questioned as I rubbed my eyes.

"Uh.. Yeah. Zoe and me are going to dinner and the movies… I might not be coming back for the night…If you get what I mean." Jimmy said glancing back at me.

"I...oh…um right." I muttered

I got up and walked into the bathroom. I looked into the mirror, worst case of bed head. Ever. I smiled lightly at my spiky, blow over to one side hair look. I quickly picked up a brush and started brushing it out.

"Alright man I'm off." he heard Jimmy kicking his shoes on.

"Alright, Have fun, Bye." I said poking my head around the bathroom door frame and waving slightly at Jimmy.

"Oh, and Pete. I left some food on the desk for you…make sure you eat it. Alright?" Jimmy said giving me a stern look.

I broke the eye contact and pulled myself back into the bathroom. "A-Alright Jimmy." I said.  
I stayed quiet until I heard the door close.

Then I walked back out of the bathroom and over to the desk. More Granola bars. I sighed and picked one up. "I'm…just not hungry." I said aloud and put it back down on the desk.

I would have to get rid of them though, before Jimmy comes back tomorrow…or even tonight if Zoe doesn't let him stay over.

I dragged myself over to the dresser and got some warm fall clothes on.

Once I was dressed I picked up the bars and shoved them in my pockets and headed out locking the door behind me.

I left the boys dorm avoiding the fights and bullies.

I walked past the library till I was at the back of the school, I opened up the bars and threw the content of them out into a garbage and put the wrappers back in my pockets.

"I hate lying…" I said quietly to myself.

I felt my stomach having a sinking feeling again.

I decided to start walking back to the dorm.

"Hey Peter!" a female voice called out after him.

I stopped where I was and looked back.

It was Angie, that tall girl with a black braids and the glasses.  
"Oh, Hi Angie." I said, trying to sound enthusiastic.

"Hey, um I was wondering why you weren't in Chemistry this morning…it's not like you to skip." she said as she clutched her book to her chest.

"I wasn't feeling well, that's all. I'll go see the teacher and catch up on work." I was about to turn around and start walking away.  
My head was pounding I didn't feel like talking or being talked too.

"W-wait." she said walked up too me more. " Well um I could tell you what happened in class."

"Alright. Go ahead. Tell me." I said, wanting to go lie down, I was getting impatient.

Angie carried on about what they did in class for what seemed like forever.

"Then next class we have to have partners… So I was wondering since I don't have a partner and you weren't there, then maybe we could.. Be partners?" she said with a small smile.

"Yeah, Alright."

"Great! Thanks Pete, See you!" She turned around, with a satisfied look on her face and headed in the opposite direction.

"If that's all she wanted she could have just asked." I muttered to myself.

I made my back to the dorm.

I put the wrappers in the garbage next to the desk and went over to the bathroom.

"erm…" I mumbled looking at different types of pills in the cabinet above the sink. Trying to find Advil in the mess of pill containers Gary left behind.

"Maybe I should just stay away from them…" I muttered.

The Sky got darker.

I fell back to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

I woke up with an unfamiliar smell, along with a faint sound of beeping.

My head was elevated, and my eyes were blurry, but I could make out a figure at the end of the bed I was in.

Jimmy….

The room became clearer, I was in a hospital room.

Jimmy was sitting at the end of my bed, slouched over and arms crossed while he stared out the window.

"Jimmy?.."

"Pete! Pete, man, you gave me a scare!" Jimmy had gotten startled and jumped out of his chair.

"Sorry.. I should have given you some warning."

"No, not that… you don't remember?"

"..remember…what?"

Jimmy let out a deep breath and moved his chair over to me more, then sat back down.

" Well…. I had gotten back to our room the next day and you were still in bed, so I woke you up and we went for a walk, then you suddenly stopped moving and collapsed on the sidewalk. Scared me shitless"

" I what!.. But I.." The heart rate machine sped up. Doubling the amount of beeps it was making.

"Whoa, calm down Pete, it's fine."

I took some deep breaths.

"But why?"

"You tell me." Jimmy's voice got cold.

I hesitated " I.. Don't know… what did the doctor say?"

Jimmy's eyes narrowed. " He said… that you fainted because fatigue or something."

"But.. I don't over exercise or an-"

" He said in some cases it's from not eating."

I choked on that.

"Pete…." he said in a icy tone.  
Beep.

Crap crap…. He's going to find out! I panicked and heard the machine start beeping faster again.

" It's not my fault I haven't been hungry!" I clenched my eyes shut and yelled out.

BeepBeepBeep.

" You could have told me! You know… _not _lie to me!"

BeepBeepBeepBeep.

"It's not like I liked lying to you! Y-you were practically forcing the food down my throat!" I felt my face heat up and tears forming in the corners of my eyes.

BeepBeepBeepBeepBeepBeep.

"As if I was going to let a friend just starve to death!" Jimmy stood up shouting now.

"Whatever Jimmy! It's your fault anyways!" I yelled, opening my eyes…. Wait? Jimmy's … fault? No.. I didn't.. mean that..

Jimmy's brows furrowed. He stood up fast and knocked over the chair. He opened his mouth, about to tell me off when suddenly a nurse rushed to the room and stood it front of Jimmy.

"Excuse me sir! Your are disturbing the patient. I going to have to ask you to leave." The small brunette nurse said as she held a clipboard pointing towards the door.

Jimmy backed off. "Whatever." He said, letting out a snort of air threw his nose and left the room.

"Oh dear, are you alright?" The nurse said, pushing Jimmy's chair to the side.

"I'm fine."

"That's good, I could hear you two from down the hall! He didn't hurt did he?" She said fixing the blankets and patting my arm.

"No, I'm alright." Crap. I didn't mean to say that to Jimmy….did I? I mean I only stopped eating since Gary got taken away.

But why….stop eating? The question echoed in my head.

"Mr. Kowalski….. Mr. Kowalski!" The nurse said, frantic.

" uh.. Oh! Sorry…"

" Are you sure your alright?"

"I'm fine, I'm just tired."

"Alright… but someone will be back later to give you your food and press the bottom on your side if you need anything, we're just a buzz away."

"Yes Miss."

The nurse left the room.

I felt guilty for shouting at Jimmy. Jimmy had brought me here and had sat there waiting for me to wake up for who knows how long.

I sighed and rolled over on my side. Slowly drifting off to sleep.

~  
I awoke to the sound of cars. Still in the hospital. There was no light coming through the blinds this time.

The room was dark except for a faint light coming from the small window from the door to the hallway.

I was wide awake now and I saw an empty tray next to me on the side table.

I already ate? I guess so.. Glancing over beside the tray, I saw a clock.  
It read 12:34am.

Really?… Well I'm wide awake now…

I needed to stretch my legs, I undid the bands on my arms that connected me to the machines and got up off the bed. I wandered over to the window and opened the blinds.

My window was facing a street. The old street lights flickered, and reflected off cars driving by.

I watched the movement outside the window….

When suddenly two cold hands embraced me from behind, wrapping around my waist. I gasped at contact.  
I was scared, I couldn't move, frozen in place as the body pressed up against me from behind.

"mmm, I missed you Pete." A voice hissed. A breath of cold air made goosebumps rise up on my skin.  
That voice…but, n-no.

My eye's were wide with fear, shock and confusion. I felt the air get tense as my head swam.

"G-Gary?" I choked out,a lump forming in my throat.

Gary couldn't be here… he was locked up, right? If he did get out that means people are looking for him…. Should I hide him? Wait… no I should be scared of him. I should call for help. But…

My thoughts got interrupted as the pair of icy hands moved up under my shirt. Slowly rubbing my stomach and chest.  
I gasped and arched my back. A chuckle came from behind me.

"unnmnn…no...nn…" I tried to protest.

"You don't like it?" The voice said darkly.

"I…nnu…n-no please.." I felt my face getting hotter and the cold icy hands felt like they were burning on my skin.

"Please what?"

"Please stop, I don't want this… I- nn."

"Then just…"

The cold body pressed his lips to my ear and whispered. "Wake up Pete. Just…wake up."

I woke up with a jolt. I sat straight up and could hear my own heart beat thumping loudly in my head.

I was sweaty and my vision blurred slightly. The beeping from the machine was fast and my breathing was heavy.

I was in the hospital still.

A tray of food was placed beside me.  
I looked at the clock beside the tray, 2:57 pm it read.

I pulled my knees to my chest and placed my head between them. Wrapping my hands around the back of my neck trying to clam down. I took deeps breath going over what had just happened.

Just a dream just.. A dream right? Gary's still locked up… I'm safe.

I had been scared yet…. happy?

I was happy to hear Gary's voice although… even if it was just a dream. But that…. t-that situation!

My face flushed. As it played over and over again in my head.  
Why would I dream about Gary and… me doing… that?

I shut my eyes and shook my head.

I tired to get my mind off it, tired thinking of something else like… what I had said to Jimmy.

When suddenly a doctor came in the room. He was a younger doctor about in his late twenties  
He has blond shaggy hair, blue eyes and a pair of thick black frame glasses placed on top his head.

"Peter Kowalski?"

"oh.. Y-yes?" I said, my voice still shaken up.

" I have contacted your parents, their both off at work conferences, but have given you as much time as you need here to recover." The doctor said glancing between the clipboard he was holding and me.

Ah. Parents…right… I had forgotten about them… they weren't really there for me anyways.

"Oh, Thank you."

"I'm by the way." he said giving me a sincere smile.

"ah.. Nice to meet you." I knew what was coming next.. A lecture on what happened.

"So….." he said bringing the guest chair over to my side. " Do you know why you passed out?"  
The doctor pulled his glasses down and pulled a pen out of his pocket.

" Well…n-not exactly…." I saw him writing something down already.

"hm… I see."

"Well I mean! I do know… I guess, I stopped eating.."

The doctor paused and looked up at me then continued writing.

"Do you know why you stopped eating?"

"Not…exactly.."

"hmm... Well some people, mostly girls in certain cases don't like their appearance so they-"

" No, no! It's not that…" I wasn't exactly thrilled with how I looked but I wouldn't stop for that reason..

The doctor ran his fingers through his hair. " Well so you do have an idea what happened."

"Yes, er…no…I just stopped eating. I don't know why. I just stopped."

"hrm… have you lost someone you care about?" the doctors full attention on me now.

I stiffened and looked down at my hands. Have I lost someone... I care about?

The doctor continued. "Sometimes when a person loses someone they love or care about, Their daily routine changes, Their needs and habits change too. Such as eating habits. It can go either way. Eating way to much or not eating enough. It's a sign of … depression."

I'm depressed? I lost someone? Ever since Gary left?

Everything was hitting me straight in the face.

"I'm…depressed?" I said aloud to myself mostly, getting stressed.

"I suppose that could be the case." The doctor nodded.

But Gary's just a friend…well my only friend I guess. I thought it over and it started to make sense.

"But how can I start eating again? I mean I feel sick after I eat."

" Well some people, take medication such as "happy pills" or pills that encourage them to eat."

I didn't like the sound of that… mostly because of how Gary told me over and over about how medication was a terrible thing, that changed who you really were. Not that I believed him but… a part of me was listening to Gary.

I stayed silent hoping there was another way.

The Doctor sighed and bit his lip. "Well another method but it costs more money for sure."

I lifted up my head with hopeful eyes.

"You could see a councilor, or a therapist."

"A therapist?…"

" Yes, depression therapists. You don't have to choose right now but please think it over."

I hesitated. Medication or a therapist.

"How often would I see the therapist?"

"After school 2 or 3 times a week at most. Of course we would have to call and confirm it with your parents."

"R-right." I thought this might not be a bad idea… but what would I tell the therapist?

That my best friend was a psychopath that tried to take over the school, tying up the teachers and convincing people to attack each other? Then got taken away to a nut house and haven't seen him in almost three months now?

"I think… I'll stick with the medication."

"If your sure…. But if you have any questions just come to the hospital and ask for me, alright?

" Alright, Thank you ."

"Your welcome Peter, and please give the hospital food a try." he said glancing from me to the tray of food next to me.

The Doctor went over some questions and left the room.

I pulled the tray on my lap. I opened up the green Jell-O Cup and started eating it with a plastic spoon

The information about depression the doctor gave me was still settling in.

A part of me said it was Jimmy's fault for sending Gary away, the same part was blaming myself for helping Jimmy , Another part of me knew it was the right thing to do, Gary had been hurting people.

I felt a headache coming on. I sighed.

I should apologize to Jimmy…

I continued to finish off my meal.


	4. Chapter 4

I had left the hospital two days later. I decided I really didn't need anymore time getting well. Plus missing school wasn't like me. Angie probably will be bugging me about it anyways.

…and Jimmy? Well he hadn't come to seen me since the outburst so I decided I'd apologize today.

I took the bus up to the school and headed towards the dorm.

I tried the door, It was unlocked. I stepped inside the room and shut the door quietly.

The bathroom light was on and I heard the tap running. I put the bag of medication on my side table next to my bed.

I went over to the dresser and pulled out some clean clothes. I was getting changed when Jimmy came out of the bathroom.

"Oh, didn't think you'd be back so soon." Jimmy voice was cold, raw and slightly monotone.

I pulled the shirt over my head and turned around to see Jimmy.

"U-um…right yeah. I did… Look Jim-"

"You don't have to say it Pete."

"What? Y-you didn't even know what I was going to say."

"Come on Pete your easier to read then anybody I know…. Except for Pee stain, but that's besides the point."

A frown formed on my face as Jimmy continued. " Look, Your going to say sorry for what you said at the hospital. It's fine. In fact…."

Jimmy stood up and walked over to me.

I took a step away from Jimmy who was getting a little to close for comfort. " I have thought about it and you might be right. It is sort of my fault. So… as a sorry present. I'm going to take you."

He wants to take me?…. Take…me.. My face flushed.. He.. I .. wait… what? I was flustered.

"Yes, take you…. To Happy Volts."

It took a second to process, but calmness swept over me.

"I figured since you and Gary were close for some strange… reason. That you might want to go visit him."

"oh…" I looked down unsure of what to say. "Well… still I was a little harsh at the hospital. I'm just not used to people caring so much that they yell at me…"

I looked up slowly and made eye contact with Jimmy.

Jimmy nodded and gave me a friendly rough pat on my shoulder.  
I winced at the impact. "Thanks Jimmy…" I smiled.  
" No problem…In fact let's bike up there tomorrow around 4: 30 ish." Jimmy said turning around heading for the door.

"A-Alright!" I felt a smile growing on my face.

Jimmy gave a half ass wave and left the room.

I decided he should go get some food.

I had made my way down to the grocery store on my bike. I had bought a microwave pasta box and a can of juice. Then headed back up to the school.

My parents had sent me a microwave just last year , I had sent them letters about how school food wasn't the uh… "safest" and sure enough they sent me one.

I didn't force them to... I just wanted to let them know how I was doing..

I got in the dorm room and placed the juice on my side table.

I put the pasta box in the microwave then sat and waited on my bed.

A visit to the asylum?… I wonder how that will go? Will Jimmy come in with me? I doubt that I mean Gary would probably want to punch Jimmy's face in and Jimmy would lose his temper. Hm I wonder.. What Gary's like… I hope their treating him well.

Beeeeeep.

I got up and got my pasta. I took my medication then ate for the first time in awhile without feeling sick.

This isn't so bad. Things were looking better for me… for now. I smiled to myself and finished my meal. Or was that just the medication talking?...

-  
I had almost fallen asleep when the door slammed open.

I sat up straight with wide eyes. Half out of my bed I saw Jimmy angrily glaring at the floor his fist slammed against the wall. His forehead and nose was bleeding, he had bruises and cuts on his face and hands.

I wasn't all that confused, Jimmy had come in looking like this before. He called himself the "king" of the school but keeping things in order was another thing all together.

I got up and closed the door.

"Let me guess… Greasers and the Preps again?" I sighed.

"ARG! Yes! They just can't stop bitching at each other for like two minutes!"He let out a ragged breath and stomped over to the bathroom.

I went on after him and got a first aid kit out of the cabinet above the sink. Jimmy pulled down the toilet seat and then sat down.

"It's not even bleeding that much anymore Pete, I'm fine." Swatting away my hand.

"Hey! You're the one who woke me up. So let me do this." I snapped at him and I started dabbing Jimmy's face where the open cuts were.

"Tch." Jimmy winced as the chemical stung him.

"Sorry, this will only take a second."

Jimmy stayed silent watching me.

"What?…"

"…nothin." Jimmy shifted his eyes away and bit his cheek.

It fell silent again as I continued cleaning Jimmy up.

"You know…Pete."

"hm?…"

"You're one of my real friends here… Thanks."

I was taken back by the sudden affection. Pausing and making eye contact with Jimmy, "o-oh… uh… your welcome.. " I looked back up at the cuts on Jimmy's forehead and shifted a little.

When I finished up Jimmy left the bathroom and flopped over on his bed.

I threw out the dirty swabs and went to go lie down as well.

"Thanks Pete. I owe you…" almost instantly I heard snores..

I looked at the time. It had taken longer then I had thought but… at least I got acknowledged for helping him out.

And tomorrow…. I get to see Gary. I lied there for awhile attempting to get sleepy again.

-  
I woke up and made my way over to the bathroom. I paused to look over at Jimmy.

Jimmy was sprawled out with and arm and leg hanging off the bed and drool pouring out of his mouth onto the sheets.

"Lovely…" I muttered. Then went into the bathroom and shut the door quietly making sure not to wake  
Jimmy up.

I undressed and got into the shower.  
I had needed a shower. I had been to embarrassed to use the one at the hospital.  
As the water ran down my torso I felt a lingering touch on my waist… from that dream in the hospital.  
Gary…

I felt my body get hot and my face flush.

A sudden knock on the bathroom door interrupted my thoughts.

"Um Yeah!" I replied.

" Can I come in and get my jacket? I think I left in on the toilet!" Jimmy yelled back.

I closed the shower curtain. It was a see through shower curtain but was quite blurry and was tinted dark navy blue.  
I hesitated. "S-Sure!"

I heard the door click open. I quickly grabbed the shampoo bottle and scrubbed my hair. I saw from the corned of my eye the blurry figure moving closer and over to the toilet.

"Alright got it. Thanks." Jimmy said. I saw him pause for a moment and look.. Back?

"um…oh right your welcome."

Jimmy stood still for a second then continued out the door.

I flushed at the thought of him being able to see through the curtain. That's nonsense, I shook my head.

I finished up and got ready for class.

I had made it to my classes today and got my work that I had missed. Quite a bit for three days.

I sighed and walked back to the dorm. I piled up the work on one side of the desk and walked over to my medication.  
It wasn't time yet. I had a schedule for when to take them so I would have to wait for a certain time.  
I put an alarm on my phone to let me know when I could take them.

I quickly checked the time it was just past three fifty.

Alright so in 40 minutes or so…

I waited in the chair at the desk for Jimmy. I was too anxious to go see Gary I couldn't focus on my work. I kept looking back at the time and fiddling with my pencil.

I realized I hadn't even thought about what I was going to say to Gary. 'Hi, How's it going?' Would not fly. How about " I'll missed you Gary." No, no I don't even know how Gary would react to that. He might be a completely different person. I clenched my jaw at that thought.

I didn't want Gary to change. I didn't want Gary to be a compete…er…"psycho" ether but I liked his bullying and teasing me. That's who Gary was…right?

For some reason I couldn't picture Gary be a wimpy dork like me. Or getting bullied by others. I wanted Gary back. Back like when we first started school together. Gary was an outcast, like me. I was too shy and quiet to talk to anyone, everyone seemed to you know.. click with each other. But I couldn't click with anyone..Until Gary was in one of my classes.

He wouldn't talk to anyone. People would avoid him too. All the seats were taken so I sat next to him. He scared me at first.. aha.. he still sorta does. But that was the first time I saw him smile. Me, cowering away on the far side of the table from him, made him laugh, in his own dark humor. I think he liked the way I was scared but... never wanted to leave him.  
Sure he was rough around the edges but he stood up for me…most of the time.

Gary would get angry if I tried making other friends... not like I could even if I wanted to.. or at least that's what Gary made me feel like.

I didn't have to worry about Gary finding a new best friend, he said friends are weak.  
But.. I thought I was his friend. I sighed. A part of me really trusts Gary and I want him to trust me too..

I suddenly heard a cough behind me. I jumped in my chair and turned around.

Jimmy was sitting on his bed. "J-Jimmy when did you get here?"

" About five or ten minutes ago."

" B-But…I…Oh." I was surprised with myself not even noticing Jimmy's presence for so long.

" Your pretty out of it Pete, The Doc. Got you all doped up or something?"

"W-What?.. No! I just, just uh-" I glanced at the time.

"Hey, hey calm down, I'm just messin' with you. …Are you sure you're ready to see him?"

"ah… Y-Yeah. Ready as I'll ever be." I scratched my neck and gave a nervous smile.

"Yeah I know what you mean…"

"hm?" ….Jimmy was nervous?

"Nothin' let's go." Jimmy stood up off his bed and gave me a pat on his shoulder.

"R-right." I nodded. As we headed out the door I grabbed my phone and shoved it in my pocket. Then followed Jimmy.

Jimmy and I rode up to the gate of the Institute.

I got off my bike first. " Jimmy you coming in?" I bit his tongue slightly. After all that Gary put him through why would Jimmy want to see him?

"…No, Maybe next time Petey." He glanced at me, then at the institute and then made eye contact with me.

"W-Well then, Here I go." I gave Jimmy a nod then went over and locked my bike up to the nearest post. I turned to Jimmy and we said our goodbyes.

I started walking through the gates of the Asylum.

I got to the reception counter. "H-Hello?"

A man came over and sat down at the desk. " Yes?"

"T-This is when visiting times are open right?"

"Yes every day, except Mondays, from 2:00 - 6:30" He looked up at Pete then at his Bull Worth vest.

" A student?…" He mumbled something. Then continued. " Who are you visiting today."

"oh, um… G-Gary Smith."

The man paused for a moment. Then leaned over towards Pete. "I know it none of my business, but why would a Bull Worth student want to visit him?" He gave a disgusted look.

I guessed that they must have heard almost everything.

I got offended slightly though and tried to avoid the mans eye contact.

"Jack! Stop harassing the kid!" a deeper voice called out from down the hall.

"Yeah, Yeah!" The Guy, Pete guessed was Jack, grumbled. "Sign here, Please."

Pete looked down at the paper. It read; if you are attacked here in the institute while visiting you will take full responsibility for it. Wow… Alright then… I'm sure G-Gary won't hurt me.. Pete signed it.

"All right kid. He's through those doors up the hall, then go through the doors that say block B, then through Block C doors. He'll be the six cell on the right." The man had a monotone voice grumbling on about something. Then scribbled a note on a piece of paper.

"Give this to one of the guards in Block C and he'll let you in the cell. Once your in the cell You won't be let out until you hit the panic button next to the door. A light will glow in the hall way and you will be let out."

"R-right! Got it…" I was trying to take in all that information while blinding walking up the hall.

First off how many blocks do they have here! Second, if Gary's in block C. Doesn't that mean he's dangerous? What about those papers I just signed?

I stressed over a few dozen questions that were floating through my head and headed to Block C.

The Hallways were quiet except for some sudden screams and the sound of Orderlies walking passed me.

I walked up to the C block doors. …Gulp…

I can do this. I felt brief wave of courage. And opened the doors and headed down the hall.

1...

2...

3...

4...

5...

6.

I stood in front of the door that read 6 on it. Gary's …right in there.

I looked to my left, then my right and saw a orderly's passing. I caught up to him and handed him the note.

The guard nodded. And took me back over to the door.

The orderly gave me a nod and opened the door.

I saw a shape lying on the bed, on it's side, facing the wall.

…Gary?


	5. Chapter 5

I held my breath and realized I had walked into the room. I heard the door shut loudly behind me and a knot seemed to form in my stomach.

The silence seemed to drag on… Maybe he's sleeping or something?..

I glanced around the room, it was gray and had a barred, blurred window on the left wall.

The bed was on the far end of the room.

Next to the door , against the wall was a wooden chair at the desk with nothing on it.

I went over to the chair and sat down. I slouched and looked at the floor, I could hear my own loud heart beat in my head.

Maybe I shouldn't have come. This was a bad idea. Like hell Gary wants to see me. I felt my face burning up and my eyes beginning brim with tears.

"shit…" I cursed to myself.

"Yes Pete, That's exactly the first word I wanted to hear from you." a raspy voice said.

I lifted my head quickly and looked at Gary.

He was now turned over facing me, with an amused smile on his face.

I analyzed Gary. His hair had grown a bit and he had huge dark bags under his eyes.

I opened his mouth but nothing came out, I had so much to ask but couldn't decide what to say. I quickly looked back down not being able to keep eye contact with Gary.

Silence fell over the room again. I still felt the long lasting stare of Gary burning into me.

I heard the bed creek as Gary sat up straight. "…New shirt?" Gary broke the silence.

"oh…Uh.. Yeah." I quietly said, realizing I had put on a white one on instead.

"Aw, too bad. I miss the pink. It suited you more." Gary said bemused.

I smiled slightly to himself. God, I have to stop smiling! I shouldn't be this happy to hear his teasing.

I shook my head and looked back at Gary. "So…uh...uhh." I couldn't just ask how he was doing, that seemed… awkward.

"uhhhhhh." Gary mocked. "Well? Are you going to ask me something?"

I winced. " N-no…"

" Then what are you doing here?"

I was taken back by the question. "Because I wanted to visit… I guess."

"You guess?" Gary raised an eye brow, still smiling.

"N-no. I mean- I-… uh. I do want to visit you, I just didn't know how you would feel about me visiting… if you even wanted me to visit you." I blurted out.

Gary studied my face for a bit making me feel uncomfortable.

"Ah, Same old Pete." Gary yawned.

"W-what? What do you mean that?" I glared at Gary.

"hrm?.. Oh nothing really, you just worry too much about people's feelings, what they want."

"I have good reason too worry about you!"

"oh. Do you now? Go ahead."

Gary obviously knew what I meant. About being taken away, what happened to Gary in here the past few months. I worried about all that almost daily. I winced not wanting to say anything about what happened aloud.

I looked at Gary who was eagerly waiting for an answer.

"Y-You already know."

" Do I Pete?"

"Yes." I said trying to give Gary a stern look.

Gary chuckled. " Ahh. Pete. I missed you."

" You miss harassing me." I corrected him.

"True." Gary laid back against the wall.

"What do you do in here? I mean.. daily?"

"You mean like piss and shower? That's a little personal isn't it?" Gary said looking amused and eyes half lidded.

"N-no! I mean yes it's personal! I mean.. ugh." I flushed. " I mean.. what's a day in here like for you?"

Gary let a out a short breath laughing lightly and leaned his head back against the wall. "Well first I wake up, eat, take morning meds, bathroom, stay in here most the day or occasionally they let us out… although I prefer not too.."

"Why? Isn't fresh air nice?"

" I suppose, but it gets loud. Mostly with the others fighting with each other. Being around them gives me a headache, anyways. Then depending on the day we have lunch and stay in our rooms or have lunch then go to therapy."

"Therapy…" I mumbled thinking back to the doctor who offered it too me.

"Mhm. So far they put me in Group therapy but that didn't go well. I couldn't stand listening to men vomit all their feelings out. So they moved me to music therapy."

"What's that?"

"What do you think? 'Music' - 'Therapy'" Gary said mocking him.

"Yeah. I get it. " I said dryly back at him.

"They try different types of music and see how it effects my behavior." Gary continued. " They show me some pictures too."

"I see-" A sudden beeping went off from my pocket. I quickly scrambled my phone out of my pocket awkwardly and turned off the alarm. " Sorry." I said checking the time.

"Do you have to be somewhere?" Gary said. Moving off the wall and let his legs hang off the side of the bed.

"O-Oh .. Uh no. Not exactly." I dug through my pocket and felt the pills container.

I hesitated. What would Gary say? What would I say to him? Oh yeah. By the way, I stopped eating since you left. Now I'm popping pills. Like hell.

" Just my alarm to… remind me to finish homework. " I said staring down at my phone.

Gary didn't say anything.

I was cautious and looked up slowly. Only to see Gary staring blankly at him.

"W-what?" I said his voice shaking slightly.

Gary moved off the bed and picked me off the chair in one swift motion, turning me around.

"H-hey!" I struggled.

Holding both of my wrists in one hand, Gary dug his other hand in my pocket and pulled out the pill container.

Gary chuckled. "I knew you were lying."

I felt my face heat up remembering the dream as Gary's chest pressed up against my back.

Gary let go and pushed me away slightly. Reading the outside of the container.

"H-Hey! That's mine! Gary, Give it back!" I said trying to reach it. But Gary held me back with one hand.

Gary's face dropped for a moment, then he smirked.

I felt embarrassed and my face felt hot.

"Happy pills Pete, Really?"

I staggered away from him not saying anything, just staring at the floor.

"I knew you were an angsty kid but I didn't think you be the type of person to resort to drugs Pete."

He continued "Seeing as there prescribed and not in a brown paper bag. You went to the hospital or a clinic to get them." He tossed the container back to me.

I caught it awkwardly and held it tight.

"How long have to been taking them? No… why are you so upset to be taking them?" Gary pressed further, now sitting back on his bed.

"I have to go." I clenched my jaw. I don't have to explain my self to him..

Gary narrowed his eyes. "That's just like you Pete!.. Running away from you're problems."

I shoved the container back in his pocket and went over to the door. I hesitated to hit the panic button.

Gary let out an irritated huff of air and lay back down on the bed facing away from me.

I can't leave like this… I stood there for a second.

"Gary..?" I said still facing away from him.

" mm?"

"In a way I'm glad you haven't changed too much."

Gary made an amused hum.

"I'm glad you have changed much either, femme-boy." Gary said with a smile in his voice.

A shiver ran up my spine as my got called by my nick-name. "See you." I muttered into a smile. Then hit the panic button and a guard let me out.

I got back to the school. And went back to my room.

"I'm glad you haven't changed much ether femme-boy"

Unaware I smiled to myself. Gary seems to be doing all right, at least he seems to be himself.

I opened the door only to find it was empty. I closed the door behind me and went over to the desk. On the desk was a white plastic bag with a note placed on it.

Here's some food, eat it k?

-Jimmy

Alright then.. I opened the bag there was a t.v. dinner and a half drunken water bottle inside. I laughed a little. Gee how thoughtful. Pete thought to himself. I took my medication, ate and went to sleep.

I woke up with a sharp breath. I wiped the sweat from my forehead and took a few deep breaths.

" Damn.." I tugged at the collar of my shirt, my heart was beating fast.

Realizing I had said that louder then I should have I looked up only to see Jimmy still asleep. I let out a sigh of relief.  
I couldn't or rather…wouldn't explain the dream I just had to Jimmy.

The dream had be similar to the one in the hospital. "What the hell.." I flushed. The feeling of Gary's hands were so vivid it made my body heat up.

I got up, went to the washroom and leaned over the sink. Turned it on and splashed my face with cold water.  
I stood there for awhile almost falling asleep standing up. I quickly turned off the tap.

"Petey?"

" oh!" I jumped slightly and saw Jimmy slouched against the door frame. "J-Jimmy.."

Jimmy rubbed his face tiredly. " Yeah, I heard you wake up, you alright?"

"Yeah I'm fine.. I guess I'm just getting used to the medication." I said with a smile.

Jimmy nodded. "So… what happened yesterday, with Gary?"

I decided to choose his words carefully, saying: 'oh not to worry he's still his usual self' … wasn't the best idea.

"He was alright, He looked really tired though."

" I mean how did he react when he saw you? Did you fight?"

"Oh. No we didn't. He seemed pretty relaxed to see me… I guess." I felt his heart sink, it's true. Gary wasn't more happy then he usual when I came to visit him.

Jimmy nodded again before going back towards his bed. I followed.

"Oh Jimmy, by the way thanks for the food."

Jimmy took a minute to remember before giving me a nod.

I curled back up in my bed and fell asleep.


	6. Chapter 6

Jimmy continued. "You're acting ungrateful I do everything to keep the whole school in order and when I ask you for one little favor it's _Oh I'm off to see Gary_!" Jimmy said now yelling.

Jimmy grabbed my wrist and stared at me.

" What's you're problem?" I said backing up until I felt the door behind me.

" Gary's going to end up hurting you! He always hurts you! When you came back from the visit you would barely talk, I thought he had done something to you." Jimmy's grip was harsh. His face looked pained.

I winced at the pain and looked back at Jimmy who was glaring intensely at me.

" He didn't do anything and I know him! And.. And I've been helping you a lot recently so, so why can't I blow you off just this once?" I shouted at him, shutting my eyes tight feeling tears forming in the corners of them.

I heard Jimmy take a sharp breath and exhale.

" Do whatever you want then." Jimmy said coldly and turned away, releasing my wrist. I opened my eyes and held my semi-bruised wrist to my chest.

I immediately felt guilty. But decided against giving in. I put on my coat and left.

-  
I locked up my bike outside the institute and went inside.

It was the same man at the front desk just like last time. As I approached the desk the man looked up.

"hm?… oh. Didn't expect you'd be back." The man said, looking back down at his magazine.

I grumbled… What was this guy's name again.. Jack?… Jerk more like it.

The man handed me a sign in sheet on a clip board.

"You're already registered so.. You're all set."

I nodded.

I signed in and Jack handed me a slip.

I walked down the where Gary's cell was.

I handed the orderly the slip.

"Oh, Smith isn't in his cell right now he's finishing up in Therapy, you can wait in his cell If you want, He'll only be 5 minutes or so."

"oh… alright, thanks" I nodded and entered his cell.

The orderly closed the door behind me.

He pulled of his coat and put it on the desk.

I sat down on the chair at the desk and pulled my knees up to my chest and rested my head on them.  
I'm tired, I probably shouldn't have taken my medication so early.

Something colorful caught my attention. It was my wrist.

"Ack… that looks worse then I thought it would be.." I mumbled brushing my thumb over it softly. It was blue and purple.  
My head pulsed. Jimmy.. Damn, I should be aloud to see Gary, I know Jimmy's only worried about me but he didn't have to get so worked up.  
It's his temper I guess… But maybe Jimmy's right… about helping him. He does work hard and it's the least I could do…I guess I'm just being selfish.

I suddenly heard Gary's voice just behind the door talking with an orderly.

I panicked and jumped a bit looking down at my wrist and then the door. I quickly pulled my coat over onto my lap covering my injured wrist and placed my other hand on top of the coat.

"Ah, I'm actually surprised you didn't come back right the next day." Gary stated as he walked through the door.

Looking over at me with a smile.

At least he's happy.. I tried to smile, but my wrist was pulsing.

Gary was carrying a note pad and an ipod with him. He had placed it over on his night stand.

"What's that?"

"An ipod. And I thought _I_ was the one stuck in a cell." Gary teased.

I smiled slightly and huffed. "No, I meant the notepad, what's it for?"

"Ah" Gary chuckled. " Music Therapy, I still have to do some. There's pictures in it and we write what we think it is at the bottom while listening to different types of music." Gary explained while he sat down on his bed.

"Oh… I see." I said. Still fidgeting slightly.

"Something wrong?"

" N-no. I'm alright."

"mhm. So why didn't you visit sooner? That's not like you Pete."

"Oh, just getting caught on homework since the-" I stopped myself. Damn it. He's going to find out about the hospital…Stupid me. Stupid, stupid me.

"Since the?" Gary leaned forward.

I couldn't think. The pulsing in my wrist, the sudden urge to fall asleep sitting up and trying to lie to Gary all at once made my head hurt.

I pulled my knees to my chest again.

" Why can't you tell me?" Gary pressed.

I held my breath. Then tears fell freely down my face.

"I don't want to.. Make you worry, you probably don't or wouldn't even worry about me right? I'm not even sure if you take our friendship seriously anyways, this is stupid, I'm stupid. Why do I even care? I don't even know why you put up with me."I blurted out, muffing my face with my coat.

Gary let out a deep breath and walked over to me. Then ruffled my hair.

I almost instantly stopped sobbing.

"You haven't changed at all, you know that? You're still such a little girl, worrying about things like friendship and feeling.." Gary said looking down at him.

I looked up at Gary, sniffling with wide eyes.

" We're friends. I look out for you and you look out for me remember? I would always tell you that in school. Even though it was mostly one sided with me always saving you're ass." Gary hugged my head to his chest.

My faced flushed, but I felt genuinely happy. It was a warm feeling that rushed over me.

Gary let go of me and went over to his bed and laid down on his stomach.

It went quiet.

I looked over only to see Gary looking down blankly at his pillow.

What's wrong with him? Didn't we just have one of those… "happy friendship" type moments?  
Is he upset? About me still not telling him? ..he probably just trying to get me to tell him what happened with the hospital! But … I feel guilty, that face he's making… I glared down at the floor.

"Gary.. I'm sorry."

Gary nodded.

I winced… Maybe that's not enough. I took a deep breath. " I'm sorry I doubted our friendship and that I haven't told you truth."

I said before flushing, I'm such a girl.

Gary smiled smugly and lifted his head to look at me. "See, was that so hard?"

Gah, he played me.

Gary let out a chuckle. "Alright so.. Want to continue with the story femme-boy?"

"I guess…" I still managed to keep my wrist covered and took a deep breath.

"Well it was a little more then a week ago, I went to the hospital. Because I fainted."

I looked up and was expecting Gary to laugh at that but he seemed somewhat interested.. Which scared me.

"Continue." Gary said sitting up now.

I nodded. "Well I fainted because I stopped eating. So the doctor put me on medication."

"Because you're depressed?"

I nodded.

" Why are you depressed then?"

I flushed and avoided Gary's eye contact. " I… I'm not sure."

"You're .. not sure?"

"That's correct. "

" I thought I told. You're a terrible liar." He said shaking his head, " Also what about you're lovely and oh so very touching friendship speech?" an amused smile grew on his face.

"T-That was just in the spirit of the moment. Or.. Something."

Gary stood up, pulled my chair over to the bed, with me in it and sat down in front of me so that we were knee to knee.

I looked up only to see into Gary's darkened brown eyes.

My heart sped up and I looked away quickly.

"Pete look at me."

I hesitantly looked up.

"Now. Lie to my face." Gary commanded his eyes half lidded.

I, now with wide eyes, " W-what? I'm n-not… uh.." I trying my hardest not too look away.

Gary got a little to close for comfort and I subconsciously raised my hands and pushed him back.

Gary grabbed my wrists to stop me and my eye's widened at the pain. My jaw tightened.

I tried to tug my wrist away almost immediately but ended up hurting himself more. "Ahnng." I clenched his jaw.

Gary seemed confused for a moment before looking at my wrist.

He paused for a moment and let go.

I pushed my chair back a bit, holding my wrist to my chest.

"Why were you hiding it?" Gary said looking intently at it.

"W-what do you mean?"

"You kept it under the coat. In fact the whole time. Why?"

"Well.. I t-told you that I don't want you to w-worry... s-so."

Pete hoped Gary wouldn't press further. He knew I was getting bullied. Everyone picks on me though, mostly for being weak and an easy target.

Gary stayed silent.

"Y-You know just some jerks at school." I said letting out a laugh, hoping it sounded more convincing then I thought it was.

" If it was just 'normal' bullying then why hide it?"

I opened my mouth and paused. Damn.. He's right. I messed up.. Quick think Pete think. I panicked.

" Y-you know like I said. Making you worry… and it was just you know Wade and them anyways so-"

" So if I could contact them and ask them if they made a large bruise on you're wrist they would say yes?"

"O-Of course not.. They would deny it because well they wouldn't want to get-"

"Wrong." Gary said coldly. I winced. "Incompetent daft people like them aren't smart enough. They would brag over something like that. Or confess and threaten me, Like ' Yeah I did it, what are you going to do about it psycho?' and such." Gary said looking at me, eyes narrowed and eyebrows arched.

I got a sunken feeling in the pit of my stomach when Gary referred himself as "Psycho" in the last part.

"I can't tell you."" I blurted.

"This again?" Gary said raising his voice slightly.

"B-But it's true…" I mumbled.

" Well why can't you tell me? And don't give me that: I don't want you to worry or it's for our friendship bull. I want an answer."

"You'll get mad Gary." I said quietly.

"Just tell me femme-boy."

I had gotten himself in-between a rock and a hard place. On one hand he could tell Gary, hopefully see that the outcome won't cost Jimmy his life and on the other hand I could leave but the chances of us being able to see each other again without this conversation coming up and very, very slim.

I bit my lip and looked up at him to find Gary studying my face.

"What if you get really mad though?"

"Will I really care so much?" Gary smirked lightly.

"I dunno.. Probably not." I muttered.

"Then go on."

I took a breath "Jimmy." I said quickly,and very shaky.

I felt like I had said a really atrocious, disgusting and a very cruel word to Gary.

I just stared at his wrist. Scared to look up, but when I did I saw Gary holding his hand to his face, thinking. No… that was a familiar face… Plotting.


	7. Chapter 7

Oh great what have I done?…

Gary briskly got up and went over to his nightstand table.

Maybe I should say something…

"Gary?"

"mm."

"You alright?"

"mhm." Still going through what looked like paper in the drawer.

Gary clearly was thinking of something.  
Should I leave? Maybe it's safer. I started shaking slightly.

Am I really scared of him when he gets like this? Maybe Jimmy was right about him not changing.. No.. he seemed better. But.. I'm not even sure anymore.

"I should be going." I got up quickly and went to the door.

I heard the drawer close fast.

"Wait, wait. I have to ask you some questions." Gary said quickly grabbing my arm and pulling me back over to the bed.

"Q-Questions?" I was pushed down to sit on the bed.

" Yes. Now.. Why did he give you the bruise?" Gary said sitting on the bed with me.

I shuffled slightly and hesitated.

"Well I-It was an accident."

Gary stared at me and raised an eyebrow. "Really?"

"Well I mean he lost his temper I'm sure he didn't mean it.."

I saw Gary look down for a moment… considering something? Then scratched his head in irritation.

"Well what got him to loose his temper."

"Um… something about cliques fighting and how he couldn't do anything about it."

"mhm. And?" Gary said quickly.

I didn't understand why he wanted to know...

"Gary maybe you should calm down…."

I trailed of as Gary glared intensely at me.

I winced. " Well I offered to help him and then he told me he didn't want my help."

"And?"

" I decided to come see you since I was done my work, but right when I told him where I was going off to he wanted my help."

"So that's the reason…" Gary muttered.

"What?" I said looked up at Gary.

" Why you really didn't visit. Jimmy kept you from coming."

"Well.. Nn.." I held my breath for a moment. " Yes.."

" Let me guess, you said no to the almighty king." Gary said dryly.

"Yeah… he told me I acted different since the last visit."

" Did you?"

" I don't know… maybe. It could just be the medication though."

Gary nodded. " Keep going."

" He had grabbed my wrist by then, yelled and he told me he thought you had um…" Pete flushed."… done something to me."

I saw a dark smile grow on Gary's face.

A wave of fear struck through me. What was that look?

"Keep going."

" W-Well I defended you."

"How so?" Gary edged closer eagerly.

I shuffled. " Well I-I said I know you and you wouldn't do something like that."

"Ah."

"Then he just told me to do whatever I wanted." I felt a guilty knot grow in my stomach.

Gary simply nodded and looked at the floor.

I looked up at him. What's he thinking.. I then reached into my pocket and checked the time.

" I better go Gary…" I stood up but Gary grabbed my arm.

"What?" I said before looking down only to see a smirking Gary.

He stayed quiet but stood up.

"Gary?" I pulled my arm out of Gary's grasp and backed away from him.

I remembered this look of his. He's thought of a plan. I thought they gave him medication for this? But what if… this isn't a disorder? Not something that can be fixed… but his own personally instead.

I had these thoughts race through my head then felt a wall behind me and realized he had backed me into a corner.

Gary advanced towards me.

I panicked and looked over at the panic button by the door hoping to make a run for it.

"W-Wait Gary! I don't know what you're thinking B-but I'm sure that there's really no need for-" I was interrupted by the sound of Gary's hand hitting the wall beside them loudly.

I jumped at the nose and started shaking.

I'm scared. I thought over and over to myself.

I screwed my eyes shut and heard Gary let out a light laugh.

"Oh femme-boy you really haven't changed."

I felt a tug at the collar of my shirt. My eyes opened wide as I felt Gary's teeth grazing along my neck and shoulder.

"Gary.. Nn." I inhaled sharply.

Gary pressed himself against me pinning me to the wall.

"This might sting." Gary whispered and I felt Gary's smile grow against my skin.

What? I suddenly opened my eyes wide, I felt instant pain on my left shoulder.

" G-Gary!" I cried. My face flushed. I realized that Gary had just sunk his teeth into my shoulder.

I felt a blood trail leak down my back and Gary released his teeth from my shoulder.

I was too scared to move and held my arms close to myself shivering.

I felt Gary's tongue lick lightly over the wound and him make small bites up the side of my neck.

I was panting, I let out a moan, not recalling when any of that felt good.

Gary's mouth made it's way up over to my chin and hovered over my mouth. I could feel Gary breathing on me, but kept my eye shut.

Gary plunged his tongue into my mouth, giving me a rough wet kiss before freezing.

I then felt Gary push himself off of me. A string of saliva breaking as Gary backed up more.

The room fell quiet with the sound of them panting. My face was flushed and my body was hot.

I opened my eyes slowly, tears forming in the corners and saw Gary standing back staring at him.

Gary was breathing heavy too with his hand wiping a mixture of saliva and blood off his chin. Gary looked flushed also.

I slumped against the wall catching my breath. W-what? Why did…he.. I… my heart pounded, I couldn't concentrate

Gary turned away from me and was running his figures through his hair.

"Damn it Pete." Gary said in an uneven and husky tone.

I opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out.

"Go Pete."

What.. He… wants me to.. Leave now? I.. He.. But we.. My head pounded and I felt like I wanted to cry but couldn't.

"Now." He said coldly. Making my heart sink slightly.

I stood up feeling my knees going weak, I just looked at the floor and left the room quietly.

The whole ride home was quiet I didn't make eye contact or any contact with Jack when he was leaving the building.

I had to sleep on what had just happened.

My shoulder was burning, I had a deep feeling of dread having to deal with Jimmy when I got back. I was most of all hurt, angry and happy. All at the same time which made me feel extremely nauseous.

I was hurt from Gary's actions. Angry, with not only Gary, but myself. I had defended Gary. But now Jimmy was right about Gary doing something to me. Happy, because…because a small part of me…enjoyed it. Those two last words in my mind made me shiver.

I walked slowly to the dorm after locking up my bike.

I hesitated taking a deep breath before opening the door to my room.

Jimmy was lying on the bed staring at the ceiling.

I closed the door.

Jimmy was still angry… I almost sighed in relief knowing if we were on good terms he would be harassing me about the visit.

I said nothing and headed into the bathroom. I shut the door and locked it.

I took a sharp breath as I peeled my shirt off, the shirt had dried to my shoulder from the blood and it stung.

I hissed and turned on the tap..

The wound was a print of Gary's teeth that scrapped along my shoulder and neck. Although luckily more visible on my shoulder. Not where people could see it too much.

I got a cloth, ran it under warm water and began to clean my back

-  
Before I exited the bathroom I put back on my shirt to prevent Jimmy from seeing the wound.

As I exited the bathroom Jimmy was gone.

I sighed again in relief and quickly changed my shirt and bottoms to something comfortable.

I pulled out the lyrics sheets out from under my bed.

Then traveled over to the desk.

I couldn't focus, my lips and mouth tingled from the memory of Gary.

I flushed furiously.

I should be mad at him! How could he… do that and we didn't talk. He didn't explain.

I leaned back in my chair staring at the ceiling.

Gary hadn't been his first kiss but… this one seems so much more real.

I smiled at the thought of my younger self. It was a fuzzy memory I was way young and my first kiss had been with a boy too. The boy back then made a promise with me.

I could barely hear the boy's voice ring in my head.

So familiar…

The sound of a door closing interrupted my thoughts.

I spun around and saw Jimmy.

We made brief eye contact. I was first to break it and turned back around.

I'll just ignore Jimmy.. For now at least until I get my head in the right place.

"Pete…I know you're angry but I'm just trying to look out for you."

I felt a twang of guilt. But nodded.

Jimmy was still a bit irritated, but I couldn't blame him.

"So.. How was the visit?"

That was the last thing I wanted to answer.

In fact I froze. I hadn't even had time to think of what to say to Jimmy about it.

"Petey?" Jimmy said now sitting on his bed facing me.

I just stared down on at the desk. Damn it say something!

"It was fine." I said more quiet then intended.

Jimmy stared at him for a long moment.

"Fine?"

I held my breath.

" What happened? You fight or somethin?"

"Y-Yeah I guess you could say that."

Jimmy nodded and lay down on his bed.

I continued to stare at my sheet, glad that Jimmy didn't dwell on the topic.

I picked my papers off the desk, went over to my bed and put the sheets in my nightstand.

I lay down as well and drifted off into a sleep.

I felt the an eerie warm sun light beam down on me and I was in a park, it was quiet.

With a forest surrounding part of it, with a beach down the hill.

The sky was blue with few clouds.

There were no other kids. Wait... no. There was someone else. Holding his hands. The boy's face was blurry, and he couldn't make out who it was.

The boy pressed his forehead against mine.

The boy's mouth moved but no sound came out except for the last few words.

Forever Always.

Warm feeling rushed over me like static. Except clam. The boy's face began to become clear. ~~

Then.

I opened my eyes. The morning light leaked through the curtains.

I sat up, paused for a moment. "…Forever Always…" I whispered smiling to myself.


	8. Chapter 8

The next day I had spent my classes thinking over what happened with Gary.

Gary always does something for a reason… I thought to myself as I wandered to my last class of the day, Gym.

He was planning something so… am I part of his plan?.. Or did he just...want to.. I flushed and dismissed the thought.

I had quite a few questions to ask Gary. But was more scared then curious . So I decided against going to see him for now.

I pressed my hand up to my shoulder where the wound was. I can't believe he bit me though… I flushed again and furrowed my eyebrows in confusion.

I went into the boys changing room and tried to keep quiet passing the jocks who hang around there and others in the class.

I hesitated before taking off his shirt. Jimmy actually showed up this time for class and was in the change room too.

This was one of the few times I thought about skipping. I didn't like skipping, I always felt guilty.

I can't let Jimmy see the bite mark though, since it's a giant hickey… and others would tease but Jimmy would know who did it…

I tried to slip past the jocks again but..

"Where you off to, shortie?" Juri said smirking down at me.

"Uh..um.." I mumbled, looking up at him and backing up slightly.

"It's dodge ball today and already most of you weaklings aren't showing up! It will be boring class if there's nothing to hit. " He said laughing.

"I forgot my gym clothes…so.. I should go get them." I said trying not too look him in the eye.

Juri furrowed his eyebrows. Looked like he was thinking hard.

"You're lying to me! Aren't ya?" Juri boomed after a moment.

I winced and shrunk.

"Ha! Bet he is!" Kirby said now standing next to Juri.

Juri cracked his knuckles.

"Yeah! Yeah, teach him a lesson!" Kirby Cheered him on.

"Hey! What are two doing?"

I looked up and saw Jimmy rushing over.

Juri frowned deeply and snorted. "Hmph.. Nothin' "  
Juri stalked away and Kirby followed him.

"You alright Petey?"

"Y-Yeah I'm fine. Thanks Jimmy"

I paused, "Seeya then." I said trying to walk away quickly.

"Wait up!" Jimmy called and ran up beside him.

" We both have gym now, where are you going?"

"uhm.. Right, sorry, I just don't feel well."

"Your… lying."

I froze up.

"umm.. No, I.."

" If this is about Juri and them I'm sure they'll leave you alone now."

"N-No it's not that I just. Um."

"Come one Pete. You were just getting back into your classes… wait are you still eating?"

"Jimmy it's not that ether, I am eating. I just.."

"Just what? Come one Pete."

I let out a deep breath. "Alright fine."

Jimmy gave me a pat on the shoulder and rushed off the change room.

I held my breath and waited for Jimmy to be out of sight before I clenched my shoulder. "That stung." I muttered.

I managed to get changed in the corner without a hassle from anyone. Luckily the school uniform for gym class was a t-shirt.

I made my way up to the gym.

"Alright! Three warm up laps then I want you in here stretching, got it?" Mr. Angelo yelled before blowing his whistle.

Mr. Angelo had replaced Mr. Burton after he got fired. He was charged for sexual assault and harassment.

Mr. Angelo was a tall Italian man with a strong build. He had dark brown hair and blue eyes. Strangely he always wore a suit.

Maybe it wasn't that strange, I was just used to seeing with with his stained white tank top and his dirty shorts.

Anyways, I was in the line up that was now heading down the steps towards the field.

Juri pushed past me giving me a harsh shove making me trip over the last few steps.  
I managed to keep my balance and glared at Juri who was now ahead laughing with Casey.

Every once and awhile he glanced over at Jimmy who was running by himself ahead of the others.

Jimmy look upset, stressed I suppose. I can't blame him. Nothing's been going right. Maybe I was being selfish. I just… I wanted to see Gary. But Jimmy does so much for the school, keeping peace and all. I should have listened to him. I felt his stomach tighten up.

The class finished doing the laps around the field and went back up the steps to the gym.

Jimmy ran over to me. " Mr. Angelo put us on the same team." Jimmy said

"A-ah." I hesitated for a moment. I hadn't realized it until now. Jimmy's been nice to him since that night in the bathroom.

Flashback~~ " You know…Pete."

"hm…?"

" You're one of my real friends here… Thanks." ~~End~

"Pete… Petey? You okay?"

"huh what?"

"Were starting now."

"o-oh right, sorry." I laughed lightly.

After dodge ball Jimmy and I went back to the change room together.

"Man Petey, You can dodge but you can't throw to save you're life." Jimmy laughed.

"S-Shut up. I tried!" I gave an angry face and laughed.

When they both entered the change room.. I paused.

"Wait Jimmy. I wanted to aplogize, for the other day I-"

"Pete, Don't. You did nothing wrong. I just get angry whenever I hear his name that's all. The fact that I even hurt you, man. I'm sorry."

I just nodded.

I went over to my gym locker and got changed quickly.

Jimmy appeared behind me.

I jumped, "J-Jimmy! That scared me, I.." I trailed off and saw Jimmy's face completely blank.

A ripple of fear struck through me. He saw it, He so saw it. Crap, oh no, um. I fumbled the words in my head.  
"Jimmy I.." I got stuck there.

Jimmy stared at me for moment, before leaving without saying a word.

I was baffled by the lack of response Jimmy gave, I wandered back to the dorm.

It was late. I had taken my medication, eaten and Jimmy still wasn't back.

Had he really seen it? He probably thinks I let Gary do that to me. I felt a blush creep across my face. As if! I w-would…

I was at the desk and heard the sound of the door click open.

" See ya Jimmy." a familiar voice said.

"See ya." Jimmy replied.

I spun around and saw the back of Zoe walking away, before Jimmy closed the door.  
I glanced down and unsure what Jimmy would say.

I spun back around quickly and looked down at the prescription I was filling out.

It was quiet, I listened to the sound of Jimmy's foot steps walk up beside me.

I shrunk in my seat and continued to stare at the sheet.

"What's that?" Jimmy said leaning against the side of the desk, over me.

"U-Um.. For my medication, I have to go in for a check up soon and get next months prescription…"

Jimmy nodded.

I felt uncomfortable with Jimmy hovering and got up.

I picked up my work and stuffed the papers in a bag at the end of my bed.

"Pete."

I sat down on the end of his bed and faced Jimmy. "Y-Yeah?"

"Are you seeing someone?"

What? It took a moment for that to process.

"P-Pardon?"

"You know… like going out with someone."

Jimmy thinks I.. am seeing someone? He doesn't think Gary did it?.. I blinked in confusion.

"Uh Jimmy.."

"It's ok if you are I just don't know why you'd lie."

"…Lie?"

"Yeah you say your visiting Gary but you barely said anything about the last visit…"

"Jimmy I think your-"

Jimmy cut him off again.

" I saw the hickey on your shoulder, so I was just wondering.."

I flushed and stared down at my feet.

"I think I know why you hid it, I'm cool with it."

"What? You are?" I blurted out slightly shocked.

"Yeah man, I mean, just because it's a guy, I've hooked up with guys before so…"

"w-what? W-w-wait, Jimmy. I think your misunderstanding this."

Jimmy stared at me confused,

"oh. It's a girl, well Pete I didn't know you swung that way. That's go-"

"Jimmy!"

"What? Why are you yelling?"

"You're not listening." I said and shook my head. "I'm not seeing someone."

Jimmy's face got more serious.

"Then you did go see Gary.."

"T-That's why apologized Jimmy." I said weakly.

Jimmy paused for a moment and soon was glaring at the floor.

"Then Gary.."

"Jimmy.."

Jimmy wet his lips and tightened his jaw.

"Jimmy don't get angry.."

" Damn it Pete! I told you! I told you he would do something!"

"I know, I know! J-Jimmy please clam down. Listen to me.."

Jimmy swiftly made his way over to the door.

"J-Jimmy.. Where are you going?"

"To go "talk" to him." Jimmy muttered, passing me.

"No Jimmy, wait, listen to me! Jimmy the hospital's not even open!

" Will that stop me? No." Jimmy said coldly.

Next thing I knew I had grabbed Jimmy's arm and pulled him away from the door.

Jimmy froze and looked back at me.

I froze also, forgetting who I was talking too. I would have let go but something made me… feel like yelling.

"You know what Jimmy? You always say how we're friends and how I'm one of your real friends here, but you never even stop and listen to what I have to say!" I said loudly.

A moment pass and I felt Jimmy relax under my hold.

I let go. "Sorry." I said quietly before backing away from Jimmy. A moment of silence passed.

"Well. Did you…uh. Did you let him do it?"

".. No."

Well I said no but I was to scared to actually move. Pete added in his head.

Jimmy sighed. Went over to his bed and sat down.

"Alright, I'll listen."

He'll what? I.. I won the argument? I stood still for a minute astonished with myself. I rarely ever stood up for myself and even more rare that I got my say in the argument.

I sat on my own bed, facing Jimmy again.

"Well…" I started. "Gary always does something for a reason."

I sated hoping he was making some sense.

Jimmy nodded slightly.

" So maybe doing.. Um that to me had a reason behind it."

"I'm certain there was a reason Petey, What are you getting at? How do you know he wasn't doing it for his own special reasons?

"I-I don't."

"Then?"

"He did it for something besides messing with me, I'm guessing."

"...A plan?" Jimmy said scratching his head. "Yeah... a plan." Pete nodded giving Jimmy a worried look.


	9. Chapter 9

The silence dragged on for a moment as we both sat there thinking.

"Any ideas?" Jimmy said rubbing his face tiredly.

I wanted to say I did... but I don't understand how Gary's mind works.

Jimmy stood up. "We don't know until we ask him right?"

"J-Jimmy.." I really didn't want to go back. At least not right now..

" I know Pete, I'll go."

"W-wait!" I stood up too. " What if that's the plan, to make you go to him." I was worried, it seemed like that would be the reason, but why now? Because he can use me? I tightened my jaw.

Jimmy hesitated. "Then what the hell do you think we should do?" he said figiting.

I knew Jimmy wanted to beat the crap out of Gary as much as Gary wanted to do the same to him, but what if Gary has something up his sleeve.

"We'll just...ignore it."

Jimmy gave in and nodded.

He paused, "You alright?" He asked, letting out a deep breath.

"Yeah." I said weakly. Truthfully? I'm mixed up at the moment but I don't want to burden Jimmy with my feelings. I gave him a smile.

A loud ring tone began to chime from Jimmy's pocket. Jimmy let out an irritated huff. " It's Zoe. Sorry Pete, gotta take this."

I nodded. The minute he picked up and said "hello?" I heard Zoe's voice angrily screaming at him on the other end.  
I winced. So did Jimmy, he jerked it away from his ear and gave me a distressed look.

He went into the bathroom and closed the door.

That didn't help much, I could still hear Jimmy.

I tried my best not to eavesdrop but... "I didn't!" …..." No! They asked for my help so-"... "Come on! You don't believe th-" …..."No Please listen I- … Zoe... Zoe!... shit."

I quickly lied down on my bed.

Jimmy exited the bathroom. I could hear him irritatedly mumbling to himself.

I turned over, I was about to try and get his mind off of her when suddenly I heard a crinkle in my pocket.  
I sat up slowly, reached into my pocket and found a piece of paper.

I held it for a moment thinking about where I got it. A flash of Gary going threw his drawer full of paper came back. I stared down at it for a moment before looking over at Jimmy who was flopped over on his bed.

I looked back down at the paper and unfolded it.

Letter: Happy Halloween, Femme-Boy. Any fun costumes this year? Also tell Jimmy he'd so the same in my position.  
My quick embarrassment vanished as soon a I saw the ext line.

What does that mean?.. Jimmy would the same?

"Petey?"

"Hm?" I glanced up quick.

"Sorry man, if you heard the thing with Zoe." Jimmy said muffling into his pillow.

"Oh, it's alright.. Sorry for listening I mean.. I didn't mean to but.."

"It's cool.." Jimmy trailed off for a second. "... she's been like this for while.."

"Fighting?" I accidentally said aloud.

"Yeah." Jimmy sighed roughly into his pillow.

"S-sorry if I'm being nosy..but why exactly? I mean you two were crazy about each other after the... um... thing with Gary ."

I heard Jimmy shuffle a bit in his bed. Then sit up, I quickly shoved the paper in my pocket.

"Yeah, you know, we really like each other and stuff." Jimmy rubbed his forehead in irritation.  
"She.. I was hoping that she wouldn't be like the others."

"That others?"

"Yeah, other girls. Whenever I hook up with someone they always get this way. The minute I spend time around another girl they think I'm cheating on them... Zoe is so chill and badass... I though she would be different.." Jimmy's voice sounded soft and different..but I shook that off. I had to help him some how.

" She doesn't trust you?"

"Ha, Pete, I don't trust her ether."

Ah..makes sense.

"But you don't see me phoning her every hour making sure she's not with another guy." Jimmy shook his head.  
"Have you talked about it?"

"Yeah. We are."

"I mean to her."

"..." he sighed. " I try! I do, she's just... and I try to..." Jimmy let out a hard breath, then hit his fist into the side of his bed.

Temper right...right. I'm not sure how I could help him.. I could talk to her...she's kind of scary.. but it's for Jimmy. I nodded to myself. What was on that letter will have to wait for now.

"Jimmy.."

"Yeah,what?" He was irritated now..

" I could talk to her...about.. that you want to, you know, work things out."

Jimmy stared out the ground thinking it over. "hm... yeah."  
" Alright Petey, You'd do that?" Jimmy gave me a small smile.

"Y-yeah. Sure we're...friends... right? So why not." I had manged to say the word, It gave me a warm feeling knowing for sure I had another friend. I gave Jimmy a smile.

Jimmy stared at me for a moment. " Thank man." he said giving me a nod before falling back on his bed.

–  
The next day Jimmy had told me to meet Zoe down in New Coventry. I decided to walk, since my bike would probably get stolen from me.  
I'm not one to judge people but I always feel uneasy when I'm in this part of town...

I was under the bridge just entering New Conventry when I saw some Greasers roughing up what looked like Jock they found. I decided not to get involved. That was until I passed and the Jock saw me, "H-Hey it's Jimmy's lap dog! A-a-ask him!" The Jock sputtered.

It took a minute... what did he call me? I froze I stopped walking in mid-step and turned my head slowly.

The Greasers who were surrounding the Jock turned to look at me.

"Hey! Jimmy's pup!" One yelled at me.

Jimmy's...Pup? My mind drew a blank. I didn't say anything I just stood there.

One of the Greasers came up to me, "Did Jimmy give permission for this kid to be in our territory?" he said squinting his eyes at me.

His breath smelt bad. That was all that I could think and I almost said let that slip out. I mentally shook my head. Focus Pete.

"I.. don't know." I managed to respond.

"Tch, frickin' unless." He said giving me a shove.

"H-he's lying! He does know!" The Jock yelled out.

" I don't care if he does! This is a waste of my time!" Another Greaser said.

About to give him a good punch.

" But if I am.. er.. right then Jimmy will be mad!" The Jock said trying to think of words... clearly having a hard time

That made the greaser pause.

Crap.

I turned my head, I should keep walking.

The greasers exchanged some looks, then the same one came back up to me. " You ain't lyin' to me?" giving me a light shove in the shoulder.

"No..." I mumbled looking down at the gum and pissed stained sidewalk.

" I said! You ain't lieing to me!" he yelled giving me a harsher shove. This time I hit the wall.

I don't know whether it's because I'm all confused about Gary or that I had been called Jimmy's 'lap dog' but I yelled back.

" I said no! Why the heck would I know what Jimmy does? I don't keep tabs on him!" I almost got ahead of myself and shoved the Greaser back, Glad I didn't..

The greaser bit his cheek and let out a snort.

I glared at him. "What?"

" We figure ya know because your his lap dog." he said sourly.

I didn't say anything. T-That's what people think of me? That I am a huge kiss ass? I suck up to him so people can't touch me? That I know Jimmy's every move? I would have proved I that I wasn't, I wanted too.. but if they asked me what I was doing right now? Just another errand for the King.

I furrowed my eyebrows and glared at the side walk.

The Greaser let out another laugh. "Run along to Jimmy." Then proceeded to beat down the Jock.

I blindly walked away into New Coventry.

"Peter?"

I paused. My head hurt.

" You alright there?" It was Zoe's voice.

" A-ah. Yeah Sorry. A lot on my mind." I said giving her a fake smile.

She let out a small laugh. " I know the feeling."

Do you? I thought to myself, tightening my jaw.

Silence.

" So Jimmy told you to talk to me?"

Told me.

"No I-..." I stopped myself, I would look more like a kiss up if I said I offered... "Yeah he did."

She nodded. " Well?"

" He wants you to trust him and he wants himself to trust you." I said blandly.

"He doesn't trust me?" She didn't sound offended though." Little shit." She mumbled, a grin breaking out on her face.

"P-pardon?" I said looking at her confused.

"Nothing! Thanks Pete you helped a lot!" She gave me an awkward hug and left.

She left me confused, I guess she's happy..Jimmy will be thrilled. Wonderful.


	10. Chapter 10

I didn't want to talk to Jimmy. I.. felt used, sort of. I know I had been doing a lot of favors for Jimmy recently but I didn't want people to think of me as a dog. It made me feel sick, having been known as the king's lap dog. Some people take pride in that sort of thing but.. I don't

I arrived at our room I hesitated before opening the door.

I found Jimmy was eagerly pacing inside. When he noticed me he did a double take. "Pete! Petey! How'd it go?"

I closed the door quietly. "Fine, she seemed happy." I said not making eye contact.

"Happy? About? What did you tell her?"

"That you both no don't trust each other."

"So she just got happy? Uh that's..That's it?"

"Yeah, I think she's fine now, well I mean you two are fine now." I gave him a nod and sat on my bed.

Jimmy broke out into a smile. " I knew you'd be able to do it! Thanks Pete!." he said giving me a pat on the head and ruffling my hair.

I pushed his hand away. "No problem."

Jimmy gave me a strange look. "Pete... what's wrong?"

"_Nothing._"

" Are you mad at me?"

I hadn't decided if I was.. so I didn't respond

"Why? Because we've been talking about Zoe so much?" He sat down on the bed next to me.

It made me uncomfortable, him being so close. I remained silent though.

" Is it because I haven't been spending time with you? I know I'm your only friend, and stuff, so I'm sorry if I'm busy with other people, they want me to spend time with them too."

_That _didn't sound self absorbed _at all_. I rolled my eyes.

He patted my head again. "We could go for a walk or watch TV or something." I felt his fingers run through my hair.

".s..stop.. Jimmy. Stop it!" I said getting off the bed and stepping away. " I'm not some kind of dog!"

Jimmy froze as if he knew what I was talking about. "...Pete."

"J-Just no! Don't ask me to do thing's for you! O-or pet me! I no... I.. I don't want to be treated." My words were getting mixed up.

I crossed my arms and held them to my chest tightly.  
I turned to the door and decided to leave, Jimmy didn't stop me this time.

I walked down the gray BullWorth streets. Staring at all the gray.  
I wanted to go, somewhere, I just wanted to sit with someone. Be comforted, not talked to though. Just... Be with someone. I felt sick when I thought of Gary but... I don't have anyone else.

I turned around, went back up to the school, unlocked my bike and rod to the asylum.

It wasn't close to closing time so I could say at least for awhile. I had forgotten my jacket however and felt a chill run up my spine.

When I entered the building it was slightly warmer then outside but not by much.

I signed in, got the slip and went to Gary's cell.

The orderly let me in, I didn't say anything or even look at Gary, I just sat down at the desk with my knees pulled to my chest.

Gary was sitting off the side of his bed. "Femme boy, I am surprised! I thought you wouldn't be back till Christmas."

"But you knew I'd come back.." I said quietly.

"Ah, Yes, yes I did." He paused. " Why so soon? Is the real question." he said watching me.

I didn't say anything I just stayed quiet and listened to his breathing.

As a moment passed, I heard him take in a a few quick sniffs threw his nose. "I wanted to make sure, but now I know, I noticed the past few visits. You smell like him." He bite his cheek and gave me a skeptical look.

I blinked and look up at Gary.

Gary held his chin for a moment. "...Wait!...Don't tell me. You two share our dorm? Together now?" Gary let out a laugh. "Pete it's your wettest dreams come true!" he continued to chuckle.

"Real funny Gary.." I glared at the floor. Even Gary makes me seem like I want to kiss up to Jimmy.

Gary let out a sigh when he stopped laughing. "Pete, you've been shivering since you got in here. What's with you anyway? You haven't even questioned our last visit. Or our 'friendship'" He snorted at the last part. Then paused when I didn't answer.

"Ohhh, I see, more trouble in paradise." Gary had a smug look on his face. Then he dropped it and he yawned."Come here." He said patting next to him.

I looked at him for a moment making sure he was serious. "Do you want to get sick?" Gary said impatiently. I quickly got up and sat next to Gary.  
Gary pulled a blanket from the end of his bed and wrapped it around me. "There." He said admiring his bundling skills.

I shuffled back, so my back and head were resting against the wall, and to make sure my legs weren't dangling of the end. Gary did the same.

The blanket smelled like a mix between him and the hospital but it was warm. I sunk further into it. "Thanks Gary.." I mumbled.

He didn't seem to be paying attention however. "Did you ever end up getting my note?"

"mhm.."

"What did Jimmy say?" He said looking up at the ceiling, he also leaned against me so we were shoulder to shoulder.

I flinched at the contact for moment before focusing. " I-I didn't get a chance to tell him actually.."

He nodded.

I frowned. " I was to busy kissing ass apparently."

Gary let out a snort and arched his brow. " I would expect nothing less of you." Gary made an amused hum.

I huffed. "Gee, Thanks Gary."

" I'm just messing with you." he gave me a shove with his shoulder.

A few minutes passed.

"You know Pete, you never told me why you were depressed enough for medication." He said glancing at me. It's true, we got distracted with my wrist..

"You left." I said with no hesitation. I was astonished at myself for being so blunt, I guess Gary was too because he didn't say anything for a moment.

" You were _that_upset at me leaving? That's kinda sad Femme-boy." he said smiling.

"I told myself the same thing."

Gary let out a short laugh. "So how does it feel to be forced happy?" I couldn't tell if his words were angry, from me always making him take his pills or were amused with the fact that I'm somewhat in the same boat as him now.

"I dunno, I don't feel any different, except for the fact I can eat without feeling sick to my stomach." I said leaning against Gary more, getting comfortable.

"Ah, I knew even pills couldn't take the angst out of you!"

"Funny Gary." I shook my head.

"Speaking of dorky! Your still so small and weak."

"Oh. We're on to flattery are we?" I said glaring at him quickly.

He let out a snicker. " You know I was thinking the other day about what I did for fun when I was free, you know plotting, schoolwork and the occasional vandalism."

"mhm?"

"I just couldn't figure out why it was so different being in here.. I still do schoolwork, plotting, in music and art therapy I get to vandalize statue's and walls. So I just couldn't place why I am so bored in here."

"You _couldn't_? So you figured it out?" He didn't say anything so I turned my head to look over at Gary. He was smiling...at me.

"I realized that I didn't have my femme-boy." he said, his eye's were half lidded and that Gary Smith smirk crawled across his face at my reaction.

I felt my cheeks burning. "A-ah. I-Is that s-s-so." I said trying to look away from his eye's.

"mmmhm."

W-Why can't I look away? ..

I felt Gary's lips lightly press on mine, For a moment he held it before breaking away.

I opened my mouth trying to speak. He held his fist over his mouth, I could tell he was suppressing a laugh.

His laughing slowed down and his smirk turned into a smile.

"I thought I told you femme-boy. Forever always."


End file.
